Tuesday, January 08, 2013

Procrastination...moi?

Day two of clearing my workspace. This is not procrastination...honestly! this is all about new beginnings....sweeping away the cobwebs..opening the channels for fresh tides that seem to be washing away the flimsy sandcastles I had built in the hope they would be a fortress..a shelter from the storm...a place of safety.

It's something I've not had a lot of experience with...Epiphany. This last weekend of course was Epiphany in the Christian church calendar...According to the definition, 'Epiphany' is an experience of sudden or striking realisation. For Christians, it defines the moment when the 'Christ' Child was at last revealed to the Magi who had travelled to witness his birth.
 
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It's quite easy to ride the waves...to allow every turn in the tide to take over...especially when you've grown cold and tired of swimming against a current...trying to keep your head above the water and on the disappearing coastline which may have been your destination...you can't tell...you've long ago stopped hoping for a hand to reach down...to pull you up to arms of strength...warmth..love...safety. but I can tell you something...a drowning man will grasp onto any hope ..anything that will keep him from going under.Sometimes it will be a floating piece of broken hull...a piece of junk...a phantom...a delusion...sometimes a voice will call out..."The answer is within you...you and only you can help yourself...be in the moment..be mindful of the water entering your lungs and be thankful for the moment"...This cannot save you..

Sometimes there is a moment... a moment when everything turns on it's head...a kind voice...someone who notices you...who reaches out...gives a little hope...All you have to do is reach..take hold of safety...suddenly you are raised skyward...dripping diamond drops of clinging seawater...solid ground replaces the ebb and flow....then you notice.. there are others...who have also been plucked from the depths...there is warmth..there is food and drink...we huddle together to keep warm ...to sing songs to celebrate our salvage.

when once you were about to die...a new hope..a new start has come....

 Of course not all is as perfect as you might think. There is still the taste of the brine..there is water to cough up..a unwanted wriggling fish you never noticed hidden in your boot. Post traumatic remembrances...dreams..emotions...it takes time...to forget the sway of the waves...to warm from the piecing cold...to begin to build again a new appreciation of living.

This is what I am doing now...


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